Book 6. The Family Book (2002)
“You loved Mama, but did not recognise it”
A fearful conjecture flashed through my mind: If my son has read all my books, then he is well aware of my relationship to
Anastasia during those first few days after I met her. He knows how I insulted her and even wanted to hit her with a stick. What child who loves his mother can forgive such shameful treatment? There can be no question that every time my son remembers this, he will think evil of me. Why did she give him my books to read? It would have been better if he hadn’t learnt to read at all. Or maybe she remembered to tear out the pages describing my despicable behaviour?
Grasping at this latter hope, I carefully asked Volodya:
“So, Volodya, you’ve read all the books I wrote, eh?”
“"Yes, Papa, I have.”
‘And did you understand everything in them?”
“Not everything, but Mama Anastasia explained to me how to figure out what I could not understand, and then I understood.”
“What did she explain to you? Could you give me at least an example of something you didn’t understand?”
“'Yes, I can. I did not understand at first why you got angry at Mama Anastasia and wanted to hit her. She is very good, kind and beautiful. She loves you. And if you got angry at her, that must mean you did not love her. But then Mama explained everything to me.”
“What? What did she tell you?”
“Mama Anastasia explained how you loved her very much but did not recognise it. But all the same, even with your love that you did not recognise, when you returned to the place where people find it hard to live, you began doing what Mama asked you to. She says that you, Papa, did everything your own way, the way you thought best. But when you remembered Mama, you wrote a book which people liked. People started writing poems and songs. People started thinking about how to do good. Now there are more and more of them — people thinking about what is good. That means that good shall prevail on the Earth.
“Yet people both criticised you and envied you over the book. But then, Papa, you wrote another book, and then another and another. Some people got even more angry at you. But others clapped their hands when you went to meet with them, they understood what you wrote in the books. They felt the energy of Love — which you still did not recognise — helping you write those books. And I was born, because you very much wanted to see me, and so did Love. You wrote the books, Papa, because you wanted to make the world better for my birth. Only you were not able to make it completely better by the time I was born. Because the world is very, very big.
“Mama Anastasia told me I must be worthy of you and the world. I need to grow up and understand everything. And Mama told me too that she has never been offended at you. She recognised at once the energy of Love. Then Mama Anastasia read you a book written with letters of the alphabet that are not sad. She did not read you the whole book. But what she read, you were able to write with letters which people could understand. And you got almost all of it right.” “What book? What do you mean, Mama read you a book? What’s it called?”
“It is called Co-creation.”