3. The first appearance of you

“The Earth! The core of the whole Universe and the centre of everything appeared as the planet Earth loomed in sight! And all at once, along with it loomed the stars, the Sun and the Moon. The invisible creative light radiating from the Earth found its reflection in them.

“In the Universe a new plan of existence appeared for the first time! A material plan, and how it did shine!

“Up to the moment the Earth appeared, nobody and nothing possessed visible matter. While the Earth came into contact with everything in the Universe, it was an independent body, too.

“It was a self-sufficient creation. Things that lived all around, things that grew in the ground, things that swam in the sea and things that flew on high did not die or disappear somewhere. Even decomposition brought forth flies, and flies became food for other life, and everything fused together into a single magnificent life.

“In their excitement and astonishment all the entities of the Universe began looking to the Earth. The Earth came into contact with everything, but nobody was able to touch it.

“With God a sense of inner inspiration surged apace. And in the light of Love, which had filled the empty space, the Divine being changed its design, and took the form which in time became known as the human body

“The Divine thought worked with no sense of speed or time. Indeed, it worked infinitely faster than all the diverse energies of thought and created with inspiration!

And again another creation which was still invisible, still within itself.

‘All at once the illumination flared up, and the energy of Love gave a quiver of agitation, as if set aflame with its newly felt heat. And in joyous elation God exclaimed:

“‘Look, О Universe, look! Behold my son! Man! He stands upon the Earth. He is material! And in him are particles of all the diverse energies of the Universe. He dwells on all the planes of being. My image and likeness he is, and in him are particles of all your diverse energies... So love him! I urge you: love him!

“‘My son shall bring joy to all living on the Earth. He is creation! He is birth! He is all of all! He will create a new creation, and will transform into infinity his ever-repeating regeneration.

“‘When alone, or when infinitely multiplied, he emits invisible light, merging it into a whole, he will rule the Universe. He will endow everything with the joy of life. I have given him everything that is Mine, and will furthermore give him for his own all that may be thought at a future time.’

“Thus for the first time you stood alone on the splendid Earth,” Anastasia ended her narrative.

“Who are you talking about?” I queried. ‘About me?”

About you, Vladimir, and about anyone who happens to see these lines you shall be writing down.”

“How so, Anastasia? There’s a complete disconnect here. How can all my readers stand on a spot where you say only one person was standing. And it talks about that in the Bible. There was just one Man at first — Adam, he was called. And you yourself said God created just one Man.”

“Quite correct, Vladimir. But look and see: it is from that one that we all have come. His particle, and the information contained therein, has been infused into all others who have been given birth upon the Earth. And if your willing thought is ready to cast aside all your worldly cares, then all the feelings held up to now in that tiny particle will be felt. It has been there all along, and remembers everything. It is in you right now and in every Man living upon the Earth. Let it unfold, let yourself feel what you have seen, and you who are in turn reading these lines at the moment, you shall feel what you saw at the very beginning of your journey through time.” “Oh wow! Then is it true that everyone living today was there, on that Earth, right at the very beginning?”

“Yes. But on this Earth, not on ‘that’ one. It is only that the Earth looked different back then.”

‘And is there a single term by which we can be called?” “You are probably more accustomed to hearing the name Adam? I shall use it, but picture it as referring to you. And let everyone picture themselves when they come across that name. I shall use some words to help in this.”

“Yes, please do. For some reason I still have only a rather faint idea of how I might have appeared in those times.”

“To make it easier, picture yourself as entering a garden on the border between summer and spring — a garden in which there are also the fruits of autumn. There are also beings here which you are seeing for the first time. It is hard to take everything in at one glance, when it is all so new and everything radiates perfection. But recall how you, Adam, saw your first flower and concentrated your thought upon it. On a very tiny flower.

“It was cornflower blue, the petals were smooth and made up of lines. The petals gently glowed, as though reflecting in themselves the light of the sky And you, Adam, sat down beside the flower, admiring this creation. But no matter how long you looked at it, the flower’s appearance was constantly changing. A breeze caressed the flower, making it sway on its slender stem, and the petals quivered under the Sun’s rays, changing the angle of reflection, giving new shadings to its tender hues. When the petals were not trembling in the breeze, they seemed to be waving to the Man in greeting, or moving in time to the music ringing in the soul. And the flower gave off a most delicate fragrance in its efforts to embrace you, the Man.

‘All at once Adam heard a mighty roar and, rising, turned in the direction of the sound. In the distance an enormous lion was standing with his lioness. And the lion announced himself with his roar to everything around.

‘Adam’s gaze became entranced by the lion’s stately and powerful stance, crowned by a bushy mane. No sooner had the lion spied Adam than the creature bounded toward him with mighty steps, the lioness right behind him. Adam could not help but be impressed by the play of their powerful muscles. Three metres from the Man the creatures came to rest. Man’s gaze caressed them, a feeling of delight was emanating from the Man, while the lion, sensing the gentle calm, settled to the ground in delight. The lioness lay down beside him, keeping perfectly still so as not to interfere with the warm and gracious light emanating from the Man.

‘Adam ran his fingers through the lion’s mane, examined and touched the claws of his mighty paws, put his hand on his great white fangs and smiled when the lion purred with delight.”

‘Anastasia,” I couldn’t help asking, “what kind of light first emanated from the Man to stop the lion from tearing him apart? And why is there no such radiance today? Nobody emits light that way today”

“Vladimir, have you not noticed what a huge difference there is even today? Man’s gaze distinguishes all that is earthly — the little blades of grass and flowers, the wild beasts and the rocks with sluggish thinking. It is curious, mysterious, full of unexplained power. Man’s gaze can be calming. And yet it can also wrap all living creatures in the cold of destruction.

Tell me, has it ever happened that you have been warmed by someone’s gaze? Or perhaps someone’s eyes have caused you inner discomfort?”

“Yes, it’s happened. You can actually feel someone watching you. You can feel a pleasant gaze, or one that is not so pleasant.” “There, you see... that means you too know that a calming gaze will create a sense of warmth within you. And that an opposite gaze will bring a feeling of cold and destruction. But Man’s gaze was many times stronger during those first days upon Earth. The Creator saw to it that all life aspired to be warmed by this gaze.”

‘And where has all the strength of Man’s gaze gone now?” “It has not all gone. Enough of it is still around, but vanity, superficial thinking, a different speed of thought, a misapprehension of basic concepts and apathy have darkened perception, and prevented it from opening up to what everybody expects of Man. Inside each one of us a warm heart abides. Oh, if only each one of us could open it wide to everything! All reality could then be transmogrified into a magnificent pristine garden.”

“Is this possible with everyone? Just as in the beginning with Adam? Could something like that actually transpire?” “Everything may be born, which is to what human thought, merging from all into one, aspires.

“When Adam was alone, the power of his mind was equal to what today is found in all mankind.”

‘Aha! That’s why the lion was afraid of him!”

“The lion was not afraid of the Man, not a trace. The lion was bowing before the light of grace. All life aspires to know this grace, which Man alone is capable of creating. For this all life, and not only upon the Earth, is ready to perceive Man as a friend, a brother, a god. Parents always strive to instil in their children all the very best abilities. Only parents sincerely want their children’s abilities to exceed their own. The

Creator has wholly given Man — His son and creation — all to which He Himself aspired in a burst of inspiration. And if all are able to understand that God is perfect, then may all feel exactly who God the Creator planned to create His child to be — His beloved son, or Man. And how He feared no burden of responsibility, and how he undertook never to abandon His creation, having uttered the words that have come down to us over the millions of years: ‘He is My son, this Man. He is My image! My likeness!’”

“Does that mean that God wanted His son, His creation — Man, in other words, to be stronger than Himself?”

‘All parents’ aspirations may be seen as a confirmation of this.” “Well then, did Adam justify God’s hopes for him on his first day? What transpired after the meeting with the lion? What did he set about to do?”

‘Adam aspired to know all living things. To define the name and the purpose or need for each living creature. Some of these were solved quickly, others he became involved with for quite a time indeed. For example, before the Sun set on the first day he was attempting to define the purpose of the brontosaurus, but here he did not succeed. And so the brontosaurus disappeared from the face of the Earth for all time.” “Disappeared — why?”

“It disappeared because Man did not define its purpose.” “That brontosaurus — is that the one that’s several times bigger than an elephant?”

“Yes, bigger than an elephant it was, and little wings it had, and a little head on a long neck that could spew flame out of its jaws.”

“Just like in a fairy tale. The folk tale about the Gorynytch Serpent, for example, which spewed fire, too. But that’s a fairy tale, not something real.”

“Sometimes folk tales tell about a past reality metaphorically, but sometimes they can be quite accurate.”

“Really? And just what would such a monster be made of? How could fire come out of the jaws of a real living creature? Or is the fire to be taken metaphorically? Let’s say, for instance, to portray a monster breathing hatred?”

“The huge brontosaurus was good, not evil. Its huge size served to compensate for its enormous weight.”

“How can its huge size serve to lighten its weight?”

“The more a hot-air balloon is filled with whatever is lighter than air, the lighter it is.”

“Well, what has that got to do with the brontosaurus? It’s not a hot-air balloon!”

“The brontosaurus was indeed an enormous living hot-air balloon. Its skeleton was constructed of very light-weight material, while its insides contained little in the way of organs. Just as with a balloon, its insides were empty, except they were constantly being filled with a gas that was lighter than air. With a leap and a flap of its wings, the brontosaurus actually managed to fly a bit. When there was an excessive build-up of gas, it breathed it out through its mouth. Flintlike fangs protruded from its jaws, and their friction could create a spark and ignite the gas welling up from its abdominal cavity, sending fire out of its mouth.”

“Hmm! But hold on there, hold on — just who kept filling it with gas?”

“Listen to me, Vladimir: the gas was produced all by itself inside as its food was being digested.”

“Impossible! Gas exists only in the bowels of the Earth. That’s where it is extracted from, then they use it to fill 1 propane tanks or send it through pipes to people’s kitchen stoves. But from food — is it really that simple?”

“Yes, Vladimir, it is really that simple.”

“I can’t believe in something that simple, neither will anyone else. And that means everything you’ve told me, for that matter, not just about the brontosaurus, but everything else too — nobody’s going to believe it! So I shan’t write about this.” “What is it, Vladimir? Do you think I am capable of being mistaken? Of lying?”

“Well, I don’t know about the lying part, but you’re definitely mistaken about the gas.”

“I am not mistaken.”

“Then prove it.”

“Vladimir — do you not realise that your stomach, and other people’s stomachs, produce the same kind of gas even today?” “Impossible.”

“You can prove it for yourself. Just take a match and light the gas when it comes out of you.”

“What d’you mean, ‘out of me’? Out of where? Where would I light the match?”

Anastasia broke out laughing and, still laughing, said:

“What are you, a little child? Think for yourself — it is a private experience.”

I thought about this gas from time to time. And for some reason the thought began to eat away at me. And finally I decided to try the experiment. I tried it directly I returned from my visit with Anastasia. It worked! And now I think back even more vividly on what she said about Adam’s first days — or, rather, our first days on the Earth. And I get the feeling that somehow we have forgotten to take with us today something from those days. Or maybe it was just me that forgot. That’s something each one can decide for himself when he learns how Man spent his first day on the Earth. This is how Anastasia described it.

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